53// How to Set Boundaries & Reduce Overwhelm in Your Nursing Job (Replay)

This podcast was one of the top 10 podcast episodes of 2024. I am bringing it back as a replay for your enjoyment as I work on new episodes for 2025.

Can you imagine finding joy in your nursing career while maintaining financial stability, even during the strenuous summer months? 

By establishing boundaries, you can achieve greater flexibility and autonomy, focusing on what truly matters professionally and personally.

From feeling overwhelmed in your role to finding a job that aligns with your aspirations, we explore how you can gain clarity. I also delve into managing ego, creating a succession plan, and recognizing when it's time to move on to new opportunities. 

If you're struggling with boundaries, this episode is just for you. 

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Transcript

2:12

Money is important. But money is not everything. I know it's weird starting off the podcast episode that way, but I say that to say, This episode is dropping in the middle of summer. And what is also just as important as money is your piece. And your joy in work. And so I am coming to you in this episode. To talk about. The combination of creating boundaries and creating joy in your work. I probably talk a little bit more about boundaries, just to kind of help you to really wrap your head around. What we can and can't do. It's an episode of permission of thinking about things a little bit differently. And then just analyzing our M I doing these things. That helped to prevent me from having joy in the work that I do. Or do I just really not like what I do. And I might need to move on to something else, but I can't see the forest for the trees. So that's what we're going to talk about on today.

Bonnie Meadows MSN, APRN, ACCNS-AG: 3:23

Are you feeling stuck in your current clinical environment? Do you want to make a change in your nursing career but not sure what to do next? Exhausted, burnt out, and maybe even ready for different leadership? I'm Bonnie Meadows, a Board Certified Nurse. Clinical Nurse Specialist, Influential Leader, Career Coach, and Well Being Coach. Being in the nursing and healthcare profession since 2004, I have felt stuck and unsure about what was next for me. I wanted to be fulfilled in my purpose, to have a voice at the table. And to be a resource for others, I kept telling myself I wanted more, but didn't have the direction I needed until I found clarity and career growth strategies for experienced nurses like me. In this podcast, you will find. Simple tactical steps that allow you to gain the clarity you need, solutions for how to grow even without supportive leadership, and guidelines for setting boundaries at work so that you can grow purposefully in your career as a nurse with a graduate degree who makes a huge impact in the profession. So get ready to trade your scrubs for yoga pants. Pop in those earbuds and let's chat.

4:38

Art's a one. Tell me that boundaries. Provide flexibility. Which is very true. And many nurses have told me that what they desire most in their work and in their career as they progress. Is more flexibility, more autonomy. As we grow in our careers. We either are getting into. More things, or we have families that are growing. And we want to be able to still do career and do other things on top of that. But not be all consuming by word because you can only go. That fast, but for so long, And many times when you're that deep in you can't see the forest from the trees and you look up and you're five years in and you're like, oh God, what did I do? All of this time you've been doing the work. But then you feel like you're on a hamster wheel. I just want to. Help you to reflect. On, are you on the hamster wheel and what are some possible ways to get off of that hamster wheel? This episode is more so focused on AMA on the hamster wheel. And is that why I don't have clarity? Is that why I don't have joy in my work. And then what are some small ways that I can. Shift my mind to get off of the hamster wheel. Once you understand what you're saying? Yes. To, and what you're saying no to you could then go deeper in the area where you want to grow. But you can't be everywhere and doing everything. And nothing matches up. So just. Think on that. I was doing a coaching. With. A nurse a few months ago. And it was a quick free coaching session. You'd be amazed at what we can get through. Talk through. During those sessions, but in that particular session, She was toying, which many of us, this is what we do. We're toying with the idea of one, like, we know we want to do something different. We have gotten the vision of. What we want our life to look like, but we're trying to figure out what we can do to help it, match up. She had some goals they were personal goals and career goals, but what she was currently doing, wasn't matching up with where she wanted to go. That particular conversation, she talked about a few roles she was interested in. One of the things I like to do in a coaching session is to get an idea of what you might be interested in. Then dig a little bit deeper on why you're interested in that particular thing. Help you understand what comes with it. What might be required maybe to think about some things you may not have thought about before. That would either push you in that direction to, take the leap or. Help you reevaluate. Maybe that's not the direction you really want to go. And then we could just figure out another direction that might be a better fit. So within this particular conversation, I gave her some ideas on things that she can possibly do. And she had like one or two areas that she wanted to do. And then, both required some sort of certification or either another degree in some area. I think both of them. Required just more so another certification. And so. We talked about those things. I hung up. That was it. And I checked on owner a month. Now, one of the things that she was struggling with was boundaries. With work because she wasn't, she was overwhelmed at work. Not being able to get things done in a timely manner. Not because of her. It's just, this is what we do. In nursing, and this is just kind of how the setting is now. To pretty much just be like we should all leave nursing. Y'all know. I love me some nurses. And I love the work of nursing, but we've got to do a better job of setting boundaries, even with our patients. Even with our patients. We've got to do a better job of speaking up and saying, Hey, this doesn't work and bring a solution with that. So I digressed, let me come back. I checked in on our month later. And she said, well, I ended up losing my job. My daughter overheard our conversation. I have a family member who works for a particular area I ended up getting a job in that particular area. And they paid for my certification, that particular specialty that she was wanting to pursue. The one thing she said that really got me, she said, if I never had that conversation with you, I would not have had the opportunity that I had, but I could not see. I was so. I was so focused in and so under me, What I was in that I just didn't even have the strength. The, just the, the desire to do what I needed to do to get from, get out from under. I was. And so I want more of us to be proactive versus reactive in our careers. We're reactive when we've gotten to the point where we're frustrated. We're bitter. We come to work may add. All for the sake of the patient or because we just don't know what else we going to do next. That's when we're reactive with our careers. Now sometimes we have to be, cause we're in a situation. I mean, I've probably acted reactively in my career. Maybe once or twice, but it still yielded. Well, for me, I was still very calculated in. My decisions, but. Almost, I feel like. My career life was probably like my dating life. Like I was very proactive. Like if there was a guy I didn't like. I was looking for some signs and I was out quickly. And me and my best friend joke. And we say, oh, well, you might can get me good for a good year. But after that, If I see some signs that this ain't working out, I'm out. Now. I'm now married. Got a good man. So thank God for that. But, I am. I want you to be proactive. In your career and it doesn't necessarily mean proactive jumping from one job to another and always to another. But it's proactive in. Making sure that you're in a place where you can grow. Making sure that you see signs of growth and your leadership working towards. Some space of growing and helping you to grow and setting an atmosphere where you can grow. Only you have the best interest at heart for you. Only you can speak up for yourself only, you know, what your heart desire is. Only, you know, what you like and what you don't like. And not that we are always guaranteed to do things that we. Like at work. But you don't want to get into a place again. Where you are bitter frustrated, trying to figure your you've got, you've got a stirring. And you're ignoring the stirring. Although you still like the people that you work with. And you still pretty much enjoy the work that you do, but you're now you're, you're drifting. Like you fill a pool somewhere else. I want to just kind of walk through some reasons why. We don't. Listen. And we are reactive for some other reasons. We tell ourselves there's no one else to do the work. So we've been doing this work for wow. You know, we've taken these projects on, or, um, and, and this is in particular for the nurse with a master's degree or the doctorate degree, or you are. Working as a nurse at the bedside, and you're very much embedded into all of the things. You might be an assistant nurse manager, you might be an or clinical supervisor, you might be involved in a lot of projects. And you may have a master's degree, but still at the bedside. And you're just trying to figure out you're taking on these other things, hoping for a promotion But you're not finding joy at work. We've probably taken on too much and we tell ourselves there's no one else to do the work. So, I guess I'll just do it. I'm just, I'm frustrated, but I'm still doing all this work cause there's no one else to do the work. There's no one else to do the work and truth be told you don't have the capacity to do the work either. But you've not said anything. Because you don't want anyone to think That you can't do the work. You just don't have the capacity to do the work. You don't want to let anyone down. And when you say, oh, I don't want to let anyone down. You're letting yourself down. So you might not be letting them down, but now you're letting yourself down. And you are now frustrated, stressed. Snapping at family. All of that. Because you've taken on all of this and you've not CIT. Boundaries. And honestly like this trickles down. Because you've been given the work that somebody else doesn't even have the capacity to do. I just want you to recognize these things and understand the constraints in which we work. And even if you decide to stay where you are, Let's figure out some ways to make the best of it. Let's figure out some ways to do something a little bit differently. And again, we don't want to sound like we can't do the work. So we don't ask for help. But then we end up stressed and snapping at people. When we give ourselves these excuses, we don't have the compassion for ourselves. Compassion presence and recovery are three elements. That I've been taught. in my training. For being a wellbeing coach. So I am a wellbeing coach and those are the three elements that we talk about. And I got my coaching from, a well-known coach, Ms. Diane SIG, who has her own wellbeing coaching program. Boundaries under the umbrella of compassion and having compassion on yourself and speaking. Positively to yourself and understanding your realities in which you are actually living and uncovering that, which is unrealistic in which you do every day, whether it be at home or whether it be at work, they affect one another. That is that compassion that you need to have on yourself in order to lift that burden and to have a little bit more joy in your life. And to see things just a little bit differently. When we don't have that compassion for ourselves, we tend to blame ourselves for the work. When in actuality, it's just not possible. We make ourselves think that it's possible, but it's not, it's really not. And that's why you don't have joy in work. And this year, summer. You need to find a way to have some joy at work. Need to find a way. I'm just here to make it evident to you and known to you so that you can start to reflect. On better ways to have joy at work. Things have possibly slowed down it's summer. More people are off this, that, and the other. So this is your time to really take a little bit of a step back and really think about. What is it that's causing me to not have joy at work. Here's why we need to set some boundaries. So that we can clearly see what we like, what we don't like about the work that we do. So that we can see ways to make the work. We do better, especially if we like the word, like I want you to stay in it. Make yourself. Known. In that area, make yourself the subject matter expert. We must set boundaries so that we can clearly see ways to remove our ego. From the process and engage others. Ooh. Is your ego at play and that's why you're overwhelmed. Oh, I'm the only one that can do the work. I'm like, my name is attached to this. I understand ego. I'm not pointing fingers cause I have, I've had an ego and it has been broken down. It has been broken down, not by others. But God has literally placed me in a position to where it is. This is like the. It's not that serious. And I have been able to make a name for myself by just doing the work, being engaged. And letting it go. Not dropping a ball. But just pretty much saying how can we make this process better? Even if I'm not the one at the table. That knows the work in depth. I know how to move the chess pieces around. And so how do we remove our ego from the process and engage others so that we can get more joy at work? So that. We can build support around us because other people want to get in on network. And so that we can create a system, a succession plan, because you don't want to be doing that same thing forever. Lastly, we must set boundaries so that we can clearly see and know when it's time to hold them. Fold them. And walk away to our next. We can't be so tightly bound to something. That were afraid to just pass it on to someone else. And then we stay there longer than we should. And then people are looking at you and looking around, like, when is she leaving? Cause she's holding us up. He's holding us up from making progress in this thing. Don't stay somewhere longer than you should holding up someone else from being able to have an opportunity in that space. But then you're holding yourself up. From being able to have opportunity in another space where you have a bigger voice at the table. You're shoeing that, cause you're looking at this things that you've been holding on to. Set those boundaries. So that, you know, when to hold them. When the fold them. And when to walk away to your next. If you need help with those boundaries. You know where to find me. I have one-on-one coaching that is available. Feel free. To sign up for some time. And we can walk through ways that you can set brown boundaries within your work. Because I've been there. I've been overwhelmed. I've had to set boundaries. I've had to figure out like, what is absolutely. At that, I'd what I need to do versus. Like, I don't really need to do this. And present it in a way. To where you're not, you're saying no. But you're saying no. And providing options at the same time. So I hope that you take this episode really reflect on how do you create more joy at work by setting boundaries and not getting bitter with it, there's a way to do it. There's a way to say no, that is appropriate. There's a way to shift. Responsibility. That's hard for me because when there just lots of great things going on. I want to raise my hand for everything. Oh, I'll do that. I do that. And then I find myself in a not so great position. And not enjoying the space that I'm in because I'm doing too many things. I just don't want anyone to think. That they have to stay where they are and they have to be miserable. See you next time. I hope you enjoyed today's episode. If so, would you take 30 seconds and share it with another nurse who may be unsure of where to go next in their career or maybe need some career clarity? Also, please leave a quick review for the show on Apple podcast. It brings me so much joy and so much encouragement to know this podcast is helping you. Now go get the career you want and not the one you settle for. And I'll meet you back here next Thursday for another episode. See you soon!